Dear Little B

Tuesday, February 24, 2015

Grandma and I cleaned the whole apartment today and then did some last minute shopping. When I came home to our spotless little apartment I cried. The smell and feel seem to be such tangible evidence of the change we are about to experience. Then I called your dad and cried some more. Someday you'll see what I mean when I say that even the best changes are hard. 

I'm lying here just feeling you kick and I can't believe that today is the last day I'll feel you moving inside me. I've loved carrying you for 9 months and I love the bond I feel with you as I feel you move and squirm and stretch. I'm going to miss being pregnant. I'll miss the anticipation, the growing belly, feeling your hiccups at least 5 times each day, the funny looks I get when we're out and about, your dad feeling you move when he's snuggling us, and the constant reminder of the miracle you are everytime I see my reflection. 

I feel afraid that tomorrow I won't be able to protect you like I can right now, but also great anticipation to hold you in my arms and to see the look on your dad's face when he holds you for the first time. I want to tell you a few things before you come. I want you to know how much you're loved by your dad, by me, and by Heavenly Father. Sometimes dad and I might seem over protective to you, but it's only because we love you and want you to be happy. I want you to know that you are a beautiful daughter of God. Your worth stems from your divine heritage--not from the ever-changing, worldly perception of beauty or fame. I want you to know that true happiness comes from being true to yourself, to your values, and to what you know to be true--not from following the crowd. I want you to know that you have eternal and unlimited potential and I hope you'll always seek to follow your dreams. 

See you tomorrow little one.

Love,

Mom