It's been a while!

 I have been so busy with work and life lately, that I haven't done very many photo shoots.  It was so fun to get behind the camera again.  This little guy is so full of life and had me chasing him down for these pictures--but it was definitely worth it.  Check out my photography blog to see more!  Don't forget to follow it while your there and "like" Stephanie Purcell Photography on facebook.  (There's a little shameless plug for ya).  :)

Another Summer Salad!

We are loving the summer salads lately!  I just made this one on Sunday and it was incredible!  If you are looking for a yummy, light, summer salad this is just the one.  :)

Picture via ourbestbites.com

*Notes* We used regular sesame instead since I had them in the house.  We also used a can of pineapple tidbits--it was amazing.  I don't have an orange juicer, but I just squeezed it like a lemon or lime and it worked.  We also toasted some almonds in brown sugar on the stove and those were great in it as well.  Matt really wanted to try it over cold pasta like a pasta salad and that was also amazing!

Landon and Julie

We have some dear friends who are hoping to adopt.  They are some of the most kind and genuine people I have ever met.  Plus they are adorable--see!  :)

I speak from experience when I say that waiting for children is heartbreaking--but there is something YOU can do to help.  If you know of anyone who is looking to place their child for adoption, or if you know someone who knows someone who is looking to place their child for adoption, please direct them to their adoption blog: landonandjulieadopt.blogspot.com.  You can also visit their family blog here.

What's Yours?

I think my favorite ice cream lately (it changes quite frequently ;)) has been mint chocolate chip.  What are some of your favorites--I'd love to try them!

Doesn't this just make your mouth water??

4th Anniversary Celebration

Our anniversary celebration was amazing.  Matt was done with finals so we had a nice, stress-free weekend all to ourselves.  Matt surprised me on Friday, May 11 by taking me to Buffalo Wild Wings (may not sound romantic, but it's my favorite so it was).  We went to the Meijer to get some treats for the night, and to the mall to pick out something new.  Then we went to our favorite little movie theater where we saw The Avengers while eating buttery popcorn, sprite, and candy.  On Saturday we got some groceries and did some cooking together--one of our favorite things.  We relaxed, watched movies, went for a walk, and took naps.  It was the perfect weekend. 

Unfortunately, I didn't get any pictures of the actual celebrations and it's kind of tradition to have a picture of us on our anniversary, so we took one on Sunday instead.

Here's Matt being a good sport while I set it up.  :)  LOVE him.

And here's us on (or near ;)) our 4th Anniversary.

 

SO glad I married this man 4 years ago!

You MUST try this.

This might sound demanding...  it is.  You haven't lived until you have tried this salad.  All the credit goes to ourbestbites.com, but the recommendation comes straight from me. :)

Picture by me :)

Matt and I made this salad on Sunday and almost died while we ate it.  Don't worry, we survived and lived to tell the story.

Just a few notes:  It's not very hard to make.  Matt thought this salad sounded kind of weird and wondered if it would be good... he LOVED it.  We used our George Forman to grill the chicken.  Blackberries were on sale so we used those on the salad instead of blueberries.  We used strawberries in the dressing--it was so amazing, I don't think I would change it.  We used freshly grated Romano cheese because I tend to like that better than Parmesan.  We toasted the almonds on the stove with a little sugar--because everything is better with sugar.  We cut the spinach out of the recipe because it was expensive at the store.

Why are you still reading?  Go make this salad!

Fruit Pizza: Help please...

Don't let this pretty picture fool you,

this fruit pizza was not yummy.  I LOVE fruit pizza, but I need help finding a good recipe.  I'm enlisting each of you to help!  If you have a yummy fruit pizza recipe please send it my way!  :)

Thoughts on Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day!  Today I have felt so impressed that I AM a mother!  My role as a mother is just different than most.  I still worry about my children everyday.  I worry about how on earth I'm going to get them here!  :)  I do everything in my power to bring them into our family, I work to provide a good home for them to be raised in, I strive to stay healthy so they will be healthy, and I worry about the increasing evil in the world and how I will teach them to choose the right.  I AM a mother.  I am their mother.  And, I have children--they just haven't made their great debut yet.

I have been overwhelmed by love today!  From the sweet Mother's Day note and gift I received from my dear friend, who also struggles with infertility.  To the tearful hug I shared with a friend at church who knows the feelings in my heart all too well.  To the texts and emails I've received from friends saying that they are thinking of me today.  To cute little boys bringing me chocolate cake.  ;)  Not to mention that Matt has made a point to make me feel loved and special today too.  There are SO many good people who already love these little ones we so anxiously wait for.  So today, I'm strong and I'm wishing each of you a Happy Mother's Day.  Thank you for your love and support!

Scenes from Our Life

Shortly after we arrived in South Bend last summer, Matt and I took a walk on campus and I snapped a few shots.  I stumbled upon them the other day and thought I would share them with all of you.  I'm constantly in awe of this beautiful place where we work and study each day.  The architecture and landscaping is breath taking.  We feel so blessed.

Tennis Balls

Ladies and gentlemen, I bring you our tennis balls.

The geese in our pond, that we dislike so much, actually produce ADORABLE offspring!  Why are little things so cute?  Matt has been at home studying for finals all week and he gives me periodic updates on what he calls the "tennis balls" because they look like tennis balls with feet.

4 YEARS down, forever to go!

I can't believe it has been 4 years since I married the love of my life.  It may sound cliche, but I really do love him more everyday.  Here are a few things I'm particularly loving right now:

1. Matt works SO hard.  He studies so much and yet still finds time to spend with me.  I'm so proud of him.

2. When Matt doesn't stay up late studying, we get to go to bed at the same time.  I love the cuddle/pillow talk time we share.  Best part of my day.

3. Watching the "tennis balls" (more on this later ;)) and bunny rabbits.

4. Eating good food with Matt is the best because when he likes something he REALLY likes it and shows it.  This also makes cooking a blast because he LOVES the results.

5. Eating lunch together everyday--it's a perfect way to break up the day.

I can't wait to celebrate our anniversary in a week or two when things slow down.  It's going to be an all out party because he'll also be done with his first year of law school!  (One down, two to go)!  Until then, here's a little timeline of our anniversaries together. :)

0 Years

1 Year (I ALMOST didn't post this--yuck ;))

2 Years

3 Years

4 Years--coming soon!!

The Red Faced Sisters

I really wish I had a picture to go along with this story, but you'll just have to use your imagination.  I'm pretty sure there is a video somewhere...

One night me and two of my friends, Lexi and Kalli, decided that it would be a really great idea to cover our faces COMPLETELY with red lipstick... we were 17 (Lexi), 16 (Kalli), and 13 (me) at the time.  We called ourselves the "Red Faced Sisters" and then filmed ourselves complaining about how we couldn't marry the "Blue Faced Brothers" or we'd have "Purple Faced Children."

I know, hilarious right?  Well, this was all fun and games until we tried to wash it off...  We scrubbed and scrubbed, but alas we ended up going to church the next day with faces that seemed oddly red.  Perhaps others thought we were just sunburned.  Luckily, our faces eventually returned to their normal pinkish hue, but we would never forget the night ~10 years ago when we became the "Red Faced Sisters."

NIAW

It's NIAW (National Infertility Awareness Week)!!

 

Funny enough, I'm sitting on my couch in my sweats with excruciating cramps (TMI?).  My heart hearts more.  I let myself get my hopes up again this month.  Now I remember why I had previously convinced myself that we would never get pregnant "naturally".  I was ok with that.  I think I was in a good place.  Then that nasty hope crept in and broke my heart again.  I have such a hard time finding balance between having hope and getting my hopes up.  I need to find that place.

I have taken the opportunity several times today to recognize just HOW blessed I am.  I know that even if we were never able to have children (I KNOW that will not be the case), I would STILL be so, so, so blessed.  I have an incredible husband who loves me so much and works so hard.  We have a comfortable home.  We never go hungry.  We have the GOSPEL!  So, my message for NIAW is: don't ignore your blessings while facing infertility. 

I also wanted to share this gem with you.  This short post provides even more insight into the struggle with infertility.  We are all daughters of our Heavenly Father, and that matters more than anything else.

Recommendations

Each weekend I make a few meals for the following week and we eat left overs for lunch and dinner each day, so I try to make things that will be great left over.   This saves SO much time.  The last thing I want to do after working all day is come home and stand over the stove for another hour or two... plus Matt is always starving and doesn't want to wait. I'm always looking for new recipe ideas, so I thought I would share a few of my favorites from recently.  They aren't mine, but I can definitely recommend them!!

Poppyseed Chicken

recipe and picture via

*Hint: I like it better with cream of chicken soup.  Serve with rice.*

Zuchini and Lemon Pasta

recipe and picture via

  Oh my goodness... this was SERIOUSLY one of my all time favorite meals.  Matt was fasting while I was making it and was dying because it smelled so amazing.

*Hint: We don't have a BBQ so I just used a George Foreman, it took a little longer since I had to grill in batches, but it still worked!  Make sure you marinate the chicken!  Also, I used fresh Romano cheese since it was already open in the fridge and it was amazing.  Don't be turned away by the red wine vinegar, it was like $1.5 for a big bottle.  Also, sometimes fresh herbs are expensive so I used all dried herbs from my spice cupboard and it was still amazing!*

Enchilada Pasta

recipe and picture via

*Hint: None really, this was amazing even without the toppings!  I just put a little more sour cream on top and I'm always over generous with the spices--I like a little kick.  I also read a comment saying it was really good with black beans instead of chicken which would be easier and cheaper!  I'll probably try that next time.*

Something New...

I was brave and had my cute hairdresser give me some BANGS!  (I feel like that word has to be in all caps).  I'm not sure if I'll get used to having something on my forehead all the time, but it's fun for a change!  She also cut about 4 inches off the end... it was getting WAY too long!

It's the Small Things

I eat lunch with Matt everyday at the Law School.  It is the best.  The other day as I was walking away to go back to work I turned around and he was still watching me with a huge smile on his face.  My heart skipped a beat.  I love this man...

...especially when he mimics the sound the geese in our pond might make if he happened to throw an orange at them.

How I Thrive with Infertility

Oh boy, I guess it's my turn isn't it?  I've kind of put off writing this post because I'm not sure I can write it as eloquently as I would like.  Well, let's be honest, it's mostly because I kind of went through a rough patch for a couple weeks where I didn't really feel like I was thriving at all.  Sometimes infertility is an all consuming beast and is just plain tough!  This is such a difficult post to write because I feel like my emotions are so close to the surface.  So, I'll do my best to not hold back without sounding like a rambling mess.

The Gospel is my main source of strength.  It seems whenever I'm having one of the tough days, all I need to do is open my scriptures and there will be a verse just for me that day.  Something will stand out like it never has before and be just what I needed to hear.  The other night I read from 2 Nephi 2:2 "...Thou knowest the greatness of God; and he shall consecrate thine afflictions for thy gain."  That is the perfect scripture for infertility!  Through the scriptures we can see the eternal perspective.  I know with all my heart that one day I'll have a complete understanding of why I needed to face this trial to become the woman, mother, and person that I need to be.  I'll see all the blessings that I can only glimpse now.  Having that eternal perspective helps me have hope each day.  Through prayer I'm able to share this trial with my Heavenly Father.  I know that he knows me personally and wants to bless us with children.  Having this knowledge helps me to rely on Him and on His will for us.  He comforts me through the Holy Spirit and I feel his love for me as I face this struggle.  I'm sure he cries with me when I cry and wishes I could see the big picture as perfectly as he does.

One Sunday morning a few weeks ago I cried, and cried, and cried, and said to Matt, "I canNOT go to church and see everyone with their babies AGAIN this week!"  (Seeing my baby buddies at church is usually one of my favorite things--not that week.)  He just held me while I cried.  Matt is definitely my pillar of strength and helps me thrive.  But, I have to do my part in that too!  Women deal with infertility differently then men.  I could choose to just shut down and say, "You just don't understand!"  Sometimes you have to TELL them what you need.  Matt knows that when I get like that I don't want him to "fix" it, I just want him to hold me, listen... and get me tissues. :)  How does he know that?  Because I told him!!  Infertility can be tough on a marriage but with good communication it can also bring you closer than anything else!

LIVE!  I don't mean going through the motions everyday, we all fall into that trap... I'm talking about really living.  I'm talking about taking time each day to take deep breaths of fresh air even if it's so cold it hurts.  Close your eyes, notice how it smells, and how the wind feels on your face.  Take walks, watch the trees blow in the wind, listen to music that makes your heart sing, read a book that sucks you in, and make out with your hubby like you did when you were dating.  Laugh until you cry.  One of my most powerful thriving mechanisms is taking time to recognize how amazing life really is!  I take extra time to pamper myself, cook yummy meals, watch my favorite TV shows, and cuddle with Matt.  I try to live in the moment and leave the future up to the Lord.

Kind of ironically, the next thing that really helps me is to have a plan.  It helps me get through the day-to-day when I know when the next Dr. appointment will be, when the next test will be, when the next treatment will be, or for some, the next step in the adoption process.  It helps me to know that we have a plan.  Sometimes infertility can make you feel completely out of control.  I feel like having a plan helps me find balance.  There are things we can do and we know what we are doing next.  This helps foster hope and give us something to look forward to.

Ultimately, I have learned to cut myself some slack.  It's OK to cry and have hard days!  Infertility is the most difficult trial I've ever faced.  It's alright to feel your heart break a little as you watch those all around you experience the joy of parenthood.  I pray for the Lord to bless me with happiness for them and understanding that I don't see all of their trials... and if I did I probably wouldn't trade mine in. :)

I know that one day I'll see the blessings as well as the pain.  I'll have more understanding and empathy.  I'll be stronger and closer to the Lord.  And for that, I'm grateful.

Getting Involved

I really enjoyed this experience and realized today that I never blogged about it.  Back in November I had an opportunity to go out and collect signatures to make sure Mitt Romney made it on the primary ballot in Indiana.  Even though it was a little cold, I loved every second of it.  Some people were mean, some were hilarious.  I've never thought of myself as a good "salesman," but I was pretty good at talking people into signing.  I was even able to get several Obama supporters to sign!!

They sent me a Romney shirt for helping out, and it quickly became my favorite "after work" shirt.  It's so soft and bright (not to mention my love of Mitt).  Go Mitt!

Hey, I Didn't Pass Out!

I think I forgot how much I love to read!!  It's been months since I picked up a good book and let it pull me in.  Within the first couple of pages this book had me in its grasp.  I was turning off the TV to pick up my book.  When I wasn't reading I was thinking about it.  I finished it in 5 days and the second book is on its way!!  The only drawback was the violence, yuck.  But, as long as I just skimmed or skipped those parts I was able to read it without passing out (unlike Breaking Dawn where I literally had my head between my knees during the half-baby, half-vampire birthing scene).  I'm usually the last person to read these popular series like Twilight, and Harry Potter, but if you haven't read the Hunger Games, I highly recommend it.

Warm and Sticky

Tonight was definitely a night I'll remember.  It was so simple, yet so perfect.  The weather was beautiful--warm, but not too sticky.  As the sun was setting Matt and I went for a walk and just kept walking... and walking.  The weather was so perfect that we didn't want to come inside!  We talked about our future, things we are excited for, vacations we want to take, places we want to go with our kids.  Matt can't wait to take our kids to the zoo so they can see all the different animals for the first time.  He's going to be an incredible dad.  I love him for that.

After an hour we finally came inside and made Mango Sticky Rice from this site.  It was warm, and also sticky... and delicious.  It's my new favorite dessert.  It was super easy too. You should definitely try it!